Head full of doubt, Road full of Promise.

Dream man, and a great song.

COACHELLA THIS YEAR-

I would really appreciate it if the universe would allow me to manipulate stef and my best friends... to going. thanks universe. also, maybe throw us some cash flow. bye.
probable head count so far : Maud, Matt & Me.

Babysitter's Club

My father went to Napa Valley and left me for a week with the kids, and it's safe to say we had a pretty good time. Here are some pics to prove it. The perks of being a babysitter, and dad came back to me with a Mondavi wine glass and a cute bamboo scarf. We drank all of his expensive German beer, which ironically is called celebrator. Wish Pil and Stef could have joined.

BURNING MAN THIS YEAR?

still blows my mind.

Masochist

half of my heart’s got a right mind to tell you that i can’t keep loving you, with half of my heart

sausagey past

- sausage rolls: oh man. I want this.


I am constantly stuck in this place, in between my future and my past and I'm not sure which one I want more. Most of the time, part of me just wants to throw myself into the future and the other part wants me to hurl myself into my past.

I have seen fear and convenience; I have never glimpsed a romance.

bye


bye


forever.
"People do it all the time, and things are normal when you don't look back. That's the trick. You have to let go completely. You cannot simultaneously hold onto the past and live for the future. It's impossible."






from the words of beagle and myself, but those that i must take-
a new year means:

new hair color

new life

new beginnings

new endings

new friends

new adventures with old friends

new family members

new love interests

new age

new body

new furniture

new state

new mindset

new creative drive

new sex

new mornings

new nighttime

new me

new you

new them

new us

new goodbyes

new promises

new forevers

same best friends.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I TELL SAM IM SAD:



I LOVE MY BEST FRIENDS. I seriously do not think I've been so happy with the people around me. I do not think I have ever had so much support with the things I've wanted to do, and the people I've wanted to let go of. Thanks guys. Thanks stef for the best christmas present ever, I cant wait to start playing with it (:

oh yeah, and roar... baby you the best.

Old Gregg- You've seen my downstairs mix up

Creepiest shit ever? Or best shit ever? Can't really figure it out.

I wonder what we would have worn if we actually had went.

I miss my best friends a lot, it takes really weird dreams and being stuck in PA with brandon to notice how thankful I am to have such amazing people in my life.

I had almost a 6 hour convo with my father the other day, it was borderline ridiculous. We got drunk together, spoke about the trials (literally) we've been through, and just got drunk over sushi on the river. I couldn't help it, I gave him his christmas present early, and he loved it ; I hope we get all of his old books and vinyls out of some fuckbag storage unit.

I feel really fucking weird lately, I think it has A LOT to do with brandon. This would basically either be our 5 or 6th Christmas/New Years together. Every Year so far we have been each others new years kiss, every year completely unplanned. This year I highly doubt it's going to happen, and it scares me that I am okay with it. oh well kids.

We went snowboarding ( well i wouldn't completely call it that ) and sledding tonight, we almost broke our fingers and faces... it WAS AWESOME.

I got a text from the director I worked with all summer involving some shit like :
Wes: I was just thinking you and your friend ( Stef ) should be here.
Muah : Where, and why?
Wes: Inglorious Bastards screening with Tarantino and his producer L Bender and Q&A.
Muah: You should have invited us before hand !
Wes: I coulldn't /:
Muah: I want details.
Wes: I'll let you know :-)

WHY CAN YOU GIVE ME YOUR BODY, BUT NOT YOUR HAND?

if you could only the hear the words

This always felt good in the summer with the top down, or long drives, or when you used to dive into the atlantic with me.


Put your teeth where you love to love
Drink some spit just to save your life
Bury parents in a moment's time
Hate it all and you still use shampoo.

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

The Inferno of Dante

“So little effort to answer another’s desire, Count yourself happy speaking as you wish. Therefore, if you escape from this dark sphere to see the beauty of the stars, and relish the pleasure of then saying, ‘I was there’…”

"Se l'atre volte si poco ti costa rispuoser tutti, il satisfare altrui, felice te si parli a tua posta! Pero, se campi d'esti luoghi bui e torni a riveder le belle stelle quando ti giovera dicere "I' fui"...

— Canto XVI

everything is chaotic

37

BAHAHAH , where youuuu at?!
Photo courtesy of Samantha Fairfield Walsh

Thankful for my life and my friends.

I'm sitting here watching E.T and Brandon sleep on my bum. Happy Turkey Day (:
I honestly love my best friends, I love Samantha and how happy she is lately, How chels helps me through the worst, How stef is someone I can look up to and she calms me down, how pil makes my day brighter and talks me out of stuff... or into stuff (;
Watched New Moon, fucking terrible actors!!! sjdsfhabkfkfbksdfbhsadfb
<3 <3 <3 <3
I am thankful for so much in my life, no matter how hard the last 5 years has been. Thank you for being there for me. I love you all.

i myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.
— augusten burroughs

Favey's of the week.

: lara stone

(:

: by gregor gaida

Lara Clarice, Maudled , and Siblings.

I am dancing around with my 6 year old sister, I envy her. I wish I was too young to give a shit or know any better. She sat in the corner of the library and started reading a book about lions in new york, she's already going to be one of my favorite people.

MAUDEE came up from flawda to see me... It was an epic reunion. I still cannotttttt believe she is here (:
This weekend will hopefully consist of , the MET, the MOMA, the BEST FRIENDS, the FAMILY, the MAUDEE, the SNOOGLING.

Marcos came downstairs and asked me to download the Misfits onto his iPod, and to get him a skateboard like I fucking promised him cause, "I don't care if i break my face." AND SO IT BEGINS...